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Slow Down to the Speed of Love

     


    When I first joined the Unitarian church, Kelly Dignan was the minister. After many years of not attending any church, I kept returning on Sundays because of how much the sermons resonated. She has since moved on to community ministry, but I think about her and various ideas she has shared often. 

    The idea I return to more and more is "slow down to the speed of love." This touchstone phrase helps me recenter to the kind of person, parent, partner, and teacher I want to be. House a mess of toddler strewn books and toys? Slow down to the speed of love. Wifi down at school and trying to hybrid teach? Slow down to the speed of love. 

     For me, slowing down to the speed of love means letting go of the things that are more superficial and plugging in to the present moment and the people your with. I don't always succeed at slowing down when I'm stressed, but it's a helpful reminder to let go of what you can and focus on what's really essential. In this season of life, with having a toddler, it's sometimes tempting to focus on the tangible things you can check off like unloading the dishwasher, folding laundry, or lesson planning or grading. When I let those things go for a bit though and resist the tug of productivity, there's a lot of magic in those unrushed moments. 

    The past week or so has felt full, but mostly in a good way. I had a long weekend last week as comp days for family conference evenings, and I enjoyed the extra days with Avi and Joel. Fall as a teacher, especially this year, feels tilted towards work, so the extra family time felt especially needed and joyful. We used the extra time to visit friends in Denver, and to take Avi to the zoo and pumpkin patch for the first time. She is so much more curious about the world around her now, and it was really joyful to see her walking through the pumpkin fields and captivated by the mini-roller coaster ride and train at the pumpkin patch. I love this age she's at, and I'm looking forward to the park this weekend and seeing how she responds to snow(!) tomorrow. 

     I'm so grateful to have had that extra family time and to return to work feeling restored, rested and better able to slow down to the speed of love both at home and at school. I'm resisting the urge to cross things off my work to do list or check email. Lighting candles and saying shabbos prayers over wine and challah helps to reinforce that priority of taking Saturday as a day of pure rest and family connection time. Do you have any weekend rituals to slow down that help you keep boundaries between work and home? 



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  1. Grateful KaeOctober 27, 2020 at 7:32 AM

    What an interesting concept. I like that! I think when we get stressed, time feels like it is speeding up. Everything goes in turbo mode, out of control. Or at least it seems to for me. The idea of slowing it down and simplifying in those occasions is great advice.

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