In this season of parenting, something I can struggle with is the constant mess and tidying cycle. I’m definitely guilty of letting a nice moment pass me by because I’m focused on all of the clean up that will have to happen later, but lately I’ve been trying to remind myself that it looks like a six and two-year-old live here because they do. I’m trying to see the bigger picture of what kind of life I want our family to have rather than snapping at kids or feeling like I’m the only one who ever cleans up (which isn’t true, but feels like it some days).
Instead of reacting to the mess in a passive-aggressive way, I’m trying to focus on decluttering, having a clear place where things go, and resetting as a family regularly. There is a lot of stuff still to declutter, but it helps to focus on our main living area where we spend 80% of our time at home. Do these systems work all of the time? Definitely not. Do I still sometimes get snippy on days when we spend a lot of time at home and I’m peeling stickers off the floor? Absolutely. But I’m trying to focus on the systems and bigger picture and also see the joy a lot of these messes represent. Here are some categories of mess I’m trying to let go of more in the moment:
* Art messes. M has recently gotten really into drawing and making art, which is the sweetest thing ever, especially since it’s an activity that she and A really enjoy doing together. Toddlers create an absolutely prolific amount of art (and mess), but it’s also incredible to see her absorbed and focused on an activity for so long and delighting in creating. I’ve been trying to enjoy the peaceful moments with both girls drawing and let go of the stray oil pastel marks.
*Kitchen messes. We eat at home a lot, and Joel and I enjoy cooking and hosting. I feel like I am always preparing a snack or meal some days, and the kitchen looks like it. I’m trying to get better at zoning things like dirty dishes and then moving on until I have the time to clean because if I waited until everything was perfectly tidy to relax or work on projects, it would never happen. At the end of the day, the kitchen is reset, and we are all fed and nourished.
*Books everywhere. This is an easier one for me--reading is my absolute favorite hobby, and it makes me happy to see evidence of kids’ reading all over the house. I’ve let go of shelf organization in this season because my toddler loves to grab and page through books on the big shelf in my room. It’s also kind of fun to curate what books are out in the living room or their rooms.
*Evidence of play. At the end of the day there is usually some funny mess to clean up: a magnatile spaceship, a baby wrapped in a kitchen towel, and the stray game and puzzle pieces that didn’t make it back in the box.
It helps to remind myself that all these messes represent a good life and happy home. One day our house will be a lot quieter and cleaner, and I will miss this season of disorder. Do you have any types of mess that really stress you out? Any tips or systems that have helped your house stay organized?
Hi Sam,
ReplyDeleteI can absolutely relate to this post.
I have an 8 and a 5 year old, girl and boy.
When they were toddlers, we had much of what you describe above. I think we reduced the amount of toys they had and that helped with clean up. We also started their chores - a two year old can absolutely place the balls in a basket or his plushies on the bed, so at least they are off the floor.
Now we have Legos. Oh, those Legos. Mainly for the boy since he loves building. It’s a struggle still, and I stepped and cursed out loud many times.
Kitchen… I suggest getting rid of any unnecessary items from the counters. I.e. the juicer. We barely used the juicer and yet it was taking up valuable real estate! So we placed it in the pantry.
One day you'll be like me, and the only mess will be paw prints!
ReplyDeleteIt's a season, that's for sure. I think decluttering IS the only way to go, and having a place for everything. But kids come with a lot of stuff!